Sochi, Black Sea –

Lissom blond 22 year-old
skier Jackie Chamoun has been offered a whopping $5 million contract as the official ‘face’ – ok, ok, tits! – of the new Agent Provocateur Thunderbra, ‘the brassiere that knocks the spots off the Wunderbra’ if the ad blurs are to be believed.

Ms Chamoun’s 34-DD stonkers caught Olympic officials on the hop after they just popped out of her ski suit during the Women’s Freestyle Downhill at the Russian Winter games this week.

“She certainly caught our imagination,” the head of Thunderbra product placement said today, “and what’s more, I’d personally be very happy to offer Ms. Chamoun a customized fitting to ensure she makes the best of both those cups.”

Chamoun went on to win five gold medals at the games, mostly in the Women’s Fully Clothed Downhill races, where she beat the pants off fellow contestants from Moldova, Eritrea and the British Virgin Islands.

Pictures of her naked bosom frosting of in the bleak Russian winter sunshine can be found on a website called ‘Google’.

Re-Spin via The Spoof