Tag Archives: Quarterback

New NFL Rule Makes It A Penalty To Touch Quarterback

empire-sports-no-hitting-qb-nfl-ruleDENVER, Colorado–

The NFL has taken on a wide new series of rules, and regulations to provide the safest game for their players. Even using new technology to create better equipment to provide a safer game has been going on for the past few years. With the new rules we have witnessed flags for hits that use to be okay, and people getting fined for playing the way they were taught how to play.

With the concussion controversy it was clear that at some point the National Football League would take the step in this direction. Starting the 2014 season it will be a 15 yard penalty and possible ejection if a defense player even touches the opposing quarterback.

The rule was put into place to protect franchise QBs from getting hurt and not being able to play. The officials have decided that a hurt QB can end a season for a team, and owners felt that losing a high salary player would be a tremendous waste of team money.

The new rule will be called “Touching the Passer” and even the slightest bit of contact will draw a flag. Classes have already begun in Denver, Colorado for NFL referees to learn what is okay, and not okay when dealing with touching the passer.

“Basically you can’t even touch the QB, your only hope is to chase him out of bounds” said an NFL ref.

“Once the QB is being pursued he has to either throw the ball or take a slid. I’m not positive how many QBs will take advantage of this new rule, and just run for 80 yards, but I feel like it will be a lot”

The rule has been sent to each team in the NFL, and certain teams are already tuning up their play books, a lot of quarterback keeps may be in our future.


Tom Brady To Pose Nude For Playgirl Magazine

empire-sports-tom-brady-poses-nude-naked-playgirl-playboy-magazineBOSTON, Massachusetts-

Heads up ladies, and some men that are still in the closest, one of the most praised quarterbacks in the NFL has just singed a multi-million deal. The talented, and handsome Tom Brady, QB for The New England Patriots has just announced he will be doing a cover shoot with the magazine Playgirl. Brady has had a very successful career on and off the field, winning multiple Super Bowls, and being a piece of eye candy for several super models.

Now, we get to see Brady in a way we never had before, completely naked. The New England QB is excited for the chance to show his fans the true Brady, and people are thinking that this will either break or make his career. Brady career may literally be hanging in the balance, if the shoot doesn’t go the way that the magazine is planning, then this could be a career ending move for him.

“I mean he is a handsome dude so ladies are going to by a lot of copies. That being said if Tom comes up with a 4th and inches in his trouser it could kill his career. There  will never be enough Super Bowl rings that can fix an ego after showing the world you have a small penis.” said a local Patriots fan

“I don’t even follow football, but I would train my entire life, go to college, get a starting spot as a center, hope to get drafted by the Patriots as a center, just to have Tom’s hands between my legs.” said one crazy lady

The issue is to be released in the late fall with people already reserving copies to the issue. Will a sack be a QBs worse enemy once again? Only time will tell.



New Animal Fighting Ring Exposed; Police May Question Michael Vick

DECATUR, Alabama – michael-vick-animal-fights-police-sphynx-hairless-cats-new-york-jets

On late Thursday evening, a police raid on a trailer park in Decatur, Alabama exposed an animal fighting ring composed entirely of Sphynx, commonly known as hairless cats. Police had been surveilling the park for several weeks, based on the tip of a former occupant who said that his neighbor was running Sphynx fights out of his basement.

“This underground Sphynx ‘league,’ as it was called, was brought to our attention at the end of last month.” Said Cpt. Logan Picard of the Decatur Animal Control Task-force. “We had been watching and waiting for the best opportunity to swoop in and take down these low-lives. We had two officers undercover in the operation, both of whom had made separate deals to enlist their hairless cats into the fighting arenas.”

Picard says that hairless cats were used because it was easier to hide evidence of animals fights if there wasn’t any fur flying all over the place. “The scene was intense. No fur on these creepy cats, but plenty of dry, old skin and blood everywhere. Imagine your grandmother’s feet after she scrapes them with a PedEgg – that’s what the floor of this basement looked like.”

This is not the first time that a major animal fighting ring was exposed. In 2007, New York Jets quarterback Michael Vick was charged and convicted of running a dog-fighting ring out of his home; fights that had been happening multiple times over a 5-year period. Although this current ring does not seem to be connected to Vick, police may question him on the basis of his “expertise” in the subject of animal cruelty and fights.

“We have contacted representatives for Michael Vick, as we would like to speak with him about this Sphynx situation. We do not believe that he is in any way connected to the fights we thwarted this week, but as he is the only person I can think of who knows anything about animal fights, his expertise on the matter is invaluable. We have reason to believe that this Sphynx cat-fighting ring is just the tip of an animal fighting ring iceberg that may include multiple parties and fights happening in several states.” said Picard.

Cpt. Picard went on to state that in the investigation, his team came to believe that several big-name players in the animal fighting world were keeping their eye on the Sphynx fights, waiting to see if it was lucrative enough to bring it into the world of “major league” animal fighting. Picard said that in recent years, research has shown that animal fights staged for money have increased dramatically. Aside from the normal dog and cock fights most people are aware of from news and media, there are also fights staged with squirrels, donkeys, monkeys, iguanas, turtles, baby giraffes, frogs, pigs, and bats.

“The last one is definitely the hardest to control. You really need that one to happen indoors.” Said Picard.

Although police have not yet released the names of any of the major players involved in these animal fighting rackets, there has been speculation by the media that the police reaching out to Vick may mean that they are thinking the fights are being set up by other big-name sports athletes.

“We are not saying, at this time, who we feel may be involved. That information will come after the arrests.”

Michael Vick is currently the quarterback for the New York Jets, and was voted the 2010 Comeback Player of the Year after being release by his former team, the Atlanta Falcons, and serving 21 months in a federal prison for his guilty plea in relation to the dog fights.

Donovan McNabb Returning To Philadelphia Eagles; Signs Multi-Year Deal

empire-sports-donovan-mcnabb-return-philadelphia-eagles-contract-2014-quarterback-vick-millionPhiladelphia, PA-

Quarterback controversy is some what of a normal thing for the Philadelphia Eagles. With knew coach Chip Kelly making his mark, it is still in the air who will be the starter this coming fall season. Now, finger point to Foles after an impressive previous season, and with Vick out of the picture you would think that he has in the bag right? Wrong.

Reports broke today that a familiar face will be returning to his old team this fall; QB Donovan McNabb. McNabb had a rollercoaster career at Philadelphia it had its ups and downs, but at the end of it you kind felt sick. He didn’t do anything really that terrible, but he never did anything really that great. Granted, he did take the Eagles to a Super Bowl he fell short to Tom Brady, and the Patriots.

Questions will be asked to why he got the offer to come back to the Eagles knowing he left on a sub pair note, but Coach Kelly is optimistic about his return.

“It’s exciting to see McNabb return to our team, and I feel we can all learn a lot from him.” said Kelly

“I’m not positive if he will be in the running for QB, but his is defiantly a person I want on my sideline on a Sunday afternoon. Our QBs are young, and McNabb has played for this team for years, and could teach them a thing or two.”

No remarks have been made by McNabb besides a tweet he posted saying “I’m coming home”.

We tried to get a remark from Andy Reid, the former Eagles coach that spent years with McNabb. Unfortunately, Reid had just eaten a calzone when we called for his statement, and was too winded to make a statement on the issue.

Teddy Bridgewater Shows His Complete Skills in 1.5 Second Video

empire-sports-teddy-bridgewater-pro-day-video-clip-1-secondLOUISVILLE, KY—

The haters have had a good time banging on former Louisville quarterback, Teddy Bridgewater, for his pre draft decline. Bridgewater was being hailed as possibly the number one overall pick for 2014. But he has done a bad job of keeping that possibility a reality. Deciding not to throw at the NFL combine was a sign that something could be wrong with the guy. Or it is possible he and his people thought that too much emphasis was placed on being able to pass the ball effectively. I mean, how important could a quarterback’s throwing ability be when it comes to evaluating a guy. For good measure, Teddy decided the night before the combine, that displaying any running talent would not be appropriate either. I’m not really sure why he bothered showing up to the combine.

Bridgewater then took it down even a notch further when he displayed his skills at Louisville’s pro day. I saw some lowlights of that performance and either they used soccer players as the receivers or Bridgewater is not very good. In a pristine environment with no pass rush or defenders at all, a QB should not have that many balls hitting the turf.

Luckily for Bridgewater, he has some sharp people around him to get his draft status back toward the top of the order. Yesterday his representatives released a highlight video to get things back on track. They hope the video will erase all the doubts that have popped up with the “non-combine” and amateur-like pro day that Bridgewater embarrassed himself with. We watched the video ourselves, but were left a bit befuddled, as it was only 1.5 seconds long. We thought there was a glitch with the online video service, but over and over we watched, and it was just 1.5 seconds of Teddy holding a football while smiling. He looked fit, well groomed, and had a perfect smile, but there was no talent or skills on display. We inquired about the point of this short clip with the QB’s reps and they simply said, “the video speaks for itself”. After I thought about it, I had to agree. One and a half seconds was plenty of time to show off Bridgewater’s talents.

Michael Vick Inks Deal With Cleveland; Welcome To The Dog Pound

empire-sports-michael-vick-cleveland-browns-dog-poundCleveland, Ohio –

Desperate for a new signal caller, the Cleveland Browns are looking to fill their need with a controversial quarterback.

The Browns had shown interest in finding a new quarterback for some time now. Weeden had not cut it and Hoyer could not do much help as he struggled to recover from injury.

Most people expected Cleveland to use pick number 4 on a franchise QB this season. Now, news out of Cleveland is confirmed that the Browns have signed ex-Falcon Michael Vick to a 5 year 20 million dollar deal.

Browns GM,  Ray Farmer, has stated that they still may consider drafting a QB but Vick will help fill an immediate need.

Michael Vick, who has a past with Dog fighting, will now be part of the ‘dog pound’.

There have already been a small group of fans protesting on the streets of the stadium before the police had to kindly ask them to take it somewhere else.

Vick’s agent believes the fans will buy into the new Vick, and this could be a step in the right direction as Vick tries to sell his new dog lover image while Ray Farmer believes these are the types of moves the Browns must take to finally get back on top.

Today, several big names around the NFL have commented on the news.

“Why would I care? I just want to focus on my own team right now.” – Joe Flacco

“Good for Vick, can’t wait to duel it out vs them.” – Ben Roethlisberger

“I don’t care who their quarterback is. Either way we are just going to sweep them.” – Andy Dalton

“Well who ever the quarterback is we’ll make sure to watch plenty of film and make sure we are ready.” – John Harbaugh

“I feel I could of been better last season. I’ll make sure to keep trying for improvement, and hope that if Vick starts that he earned it.” – Brandon Weeden