Tag Archives: Jerry Jones

Herschel Walker Returns To NFL, Signs With Cowboys

Arlington- TX  t1larg.herschel.walker

 

Herschel Walkers NFL return has already been successful as he has just signed again with the Dallas Cowboys. Walker aged 52 claimed he could still be a productive NFL Running Back even at his age. But maybe this isnt so odd as Walker has been successful boasting a 2-0 record in MMA in his late 40’s. Despite being unproductive later in his NFL career can Walker regain his old form and be an elite NFL player again?

 

Walker is known primarily for being part of the greatest trade in NFL history which led to the Triplets coming to shape in Dallas and 3 SuperBowls also. But lets look at the numbers of Walker in his “prime”. Walker only broke 1,000 yards 2 times in his NFL career. Having not even 10,000 career rushing yards with just under 2,000 carries and 4.2 yard per carry average. Unless Walker is in greater shape now than before I highly doubt he could even survive a hit let alone be an actually good player at his position.

 

Walker is on his 3rd stint with Dallas but sitting behind Murray maybe can help Walker not have to be such a big part on offense.  This upcoming training camp will be a very interesting for the Cowboys. A 52 year old Running Back  and potentially Johnny Manziel, this will be a circus all year and we look forward to seeing this unfold and blow up in Jerry Jones face. But maybe Jerry knows what he is doing. After all he said himself he is doing a great job. Ill just take his word for it.

FBI Uncovers Murder Plot Against Cowboys Owner Jerry Jones

empire-sports-jerry-jones-murdered-dallas-cowboysDallas, Texas—

Jerry Jones day just got a bit better. Maybe worse. Depends on personal opinion. The FBI just revealed that they have uncovered a murder plot against Dallas Cowboys Owner and GM Jerry Jones. This coming just days after future Hall-of-Famer DeMarcus Ware was released after  refusing to take a pay cut.

The Cowboys have lost 3 starters on their defensive line in one off-season. DE’s DeMarcus Ware, Anthony Spencer, and DT Jason Hatcher. Ware went to Denver and  Hatcher to Washington. Spencer remains a mystery as to his potential return or end in Dallas. But on to the reason behind this story. Jerry Jones had his potentially threatened by an unidentified male sometime in the past week. We do know the man is in custody but there is no other news besides that he was and had planned to murder the Cowboys owner.

“I don’t know why anyone would try to murder Jerry Jones,” said one Cowboys fan. “He’s like 117 years old.  He’ll be dead by next season anyway.”

Many Cowboy haters wouldn’t have been very happy which makes it quite funny really. The Cowboy haters love Jerry. But not in a good way. The longer Jerry stays in power the longer the Cowboys will suck. The faster Jerry is gone the faster Dallas gets a real GM and a real Head coach who has a pair. But now the poor Cowboy fans must continue to live with an 8-8 at best record under Jones. While this may be a lose-lose for everyone but Jerry Football will be saved and the Cowboys will once again entertain us on a national stage and be the laughing stock of the NFL.

So I am sorry Cowboy fans. you guys will continue to suck. Cowboy haters will continue to hate, and Jerry Jones will continue to live and run Dallas into the ground and no one can stop him. The FBI will catch you and they will stop you.  Why? Because the FBI are Cowboy haters. GG Cowboy Fans. You lose.

Breaking News: Jerry Jones named Cowboys Head Coach

Jerry JonesIn a shocking move Cowboys Owner/GM has fired the entire Cowboys coaching staff leaving no one to coach the team. But just minutes after Jones announced he would be doing all the coaching himself. Jones had the following to say about his hiring of himself:

“I just felt like after doing a great job as General Manger I should continue to expand my role and continue to give these fans what they want and that’s me being the coach. Im the best guy for the job hands down. I am going to be coaching all positions and all aspects of the team. I will be calling Offense, Defense, Special Teams.”

NFL.com put up a poll on their site with 95% of the poll showing that this is a mistake and will ruin the Cowboys and lose them alot of fans. There seems to be only one person who thinks this will work and thats Jerry himself. There is nearly a slim chance of Dallas being successful with only one coach on the entire staff.

More info on this as we get it.