Nascar Driver Carl Edwards Charged With DUI For Racing Drunk

empire-sports-carl-edwards-dui-daytona-raceDAYTONA, FL—

Reports of Carl Edwards a professional Nascar driver, being charged with a DUI is hitting all the local news.

The event happened this past Tuesday at a small Nascar event being held in Daytona, FL. Suspicions began to blossom that Edwards was intoxicated after doing celebratory donuts, before the race even began. Although, even with the suspicion Edwards was still able to enter the race, and it made it clear that he would be the victor of the race. In only his under wear he climbed to the top of his car and began to moon, and flip of his competitors.

“I thought he was just dun good and fired up, that’s kind of what America’s all about, not giving a F” said local Nascar fan.

Edwards started the race in 3rd for about 4 seconds before slamming into a wall to the right of him. Oddly enough Edwards put on his right turn signal before slamming into the wall. With his collision he took out almost half the racers, and when the medics came to check on him that’s when things got really messy.

“He had about 40 empty beer cans in his car, and a picture of Keith Urban that seemed to have been kissed” said the responding medic.

After getting Edwards out of the car…finally he began to blow up, and screamed that he was still going to win this race. He began to take the course on by foot. Only after one lap did he begin to vomit on himself, and put his thumb in the air  in an attempt to hitch hike the rest of the course.

Edwards was finally stopped by the police once they pulled over the car he had hitch hiked his way into.  When stopped by the cops and told he would be charged he blew up claiming how could he get a DUI if he wasn’t driving? The police told him that he was driving before he got into this car, and pointed to the mess that he left behind.

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